By I.M. Satire
Upon the discovery that Amazon still sold flags from hate and terrorist groups, such as Hezbollah, HAMAS, the Black Panthers, and the Nazis, Amazon executives were questioned why these products had not been removed, despite having removed the Confederate flag from all sales in the midst of recent controversy.
Chief Public Relations Officer John Sykes stated, “Well, we have removed the Nazi flag. That seemed to stir up a bit more trouble than we were prepared for.” (As of this publishing, we have confirmed that the Nazi flag has been removed.) “Still, we really didn’t think the genocide of the Nazis were quite as controversial as the racism of the Confederate flag, so thought it appropriate to leave it.” When confronted with the Hezbollah and HAMAS flags still available on Amazon, Mr. Sykes commented, “Although the United States and other nations have classified these groups as terrorist organizations, I really don’t see the problem here. Both Confederate and Nazi flags represent hate, Hezbollah and HAMAS just want to kill everyone, so free speech isn’t a problem.”
When asked about the Black Panthers, Sykes said, “The are a black organization–so they get a pass.”